CONVERSATION DYNAMICS
INTRODUCTION

Conversational skills will make you, and lack of them will break you. You may be the homeliest guy on the planet, but if you're good with words you can still have some serious game with women. It's not hard to be good with words - just pay attention to what you say and how you say it. Speak audibly - don't mumble or stutter, and put life into your hello's and goodbyes.

HOW TO BE A TRUE PLAYER
INTRODUCING THE 'KILLER INSTINCT

Most women are attracted to players. But many have too much of an ego to get with one. If they know that you're a player, then they know that there's a chance that they're going to get played and they don't want to give you that power. So never show your true colors.

THE FIRST ELEMENT: MANNER
"manner (n) : a way of acting or behaving"

If your presence and regal bearing have given women the impression that you're an important person and that you're considered an important person by others, manner, as we use it here, refers to how you act and behave in relation. What, then, is the manner of a charismatic persona?

THE SECOND ELEMENT: ENIGMA
"enigma (n) : An action, mode of action, or thing, which cannot be satisfactorily explained"

In a world growing increasingly dull and familiar, what seems enigmatic instantly draws attention. Especially when it comes to today's dating / relationship arena. Many women tend to rate guys in the same grouping: little self-control, jerks when they don't get what they want, egotistical, loud, boring, macho, aggressive. . . So anything you can do to distance yourself from this group of "typical guys" stands to get you noticed - because your distance cannot be quickly and easily explained.

THE THIRD ELEMENT: ALLURE
"allure (n) : the power to entice or attract through personal charm "

Ah, the last of the elements. It is the essence of charisma. But without the other elements, it would never be reached. When we've mentioned "aura" as a part of charisma, allure is that aura. It is infective. Women and guys alike are drawn in. Suddenly you find yourself surrounded by many friends and girlfriends ("groupies"). And once in your presence, it's hard for them to distance themselves - as long as you continue to pay attention to each individual element. For example, diplomacy: When you excel in diplomacy, you learn to make others feel better about themselves, becoming a source of pleasure to them. In fact, they grow dependent on your manner to feel good about themselves. You may call them friends, but psychologically they become your followers. Other people read this - and enigma kicks in and heightens the effect: these other people start to wonder subconsciously: There must be something exceptional ("cool" or "charming") about you that's making people want to be around you. . . What is it? Imaginations start to race.

Suddenly we've revealed the truth to you - charisma and manipulation are very similar. At the beginning of this article we gave you a dictionary definition of the word charisma:

charisma (n) : a personal attractiveness that enables you to influence others

And now we'll do the same for manipulation:

manipulation (n) : exerting shrewd or devious influence especially for one's own advantage

If manipulation is a skill that is learned, then so is charisma. Con artists, it can be said, are the epitome of manipulation. When you think of a manipulator, you probably think of some slick-talking salesman or womanizer. You can see his act from a mile away. But a true con artist, you can't see his act - he's so disguised in an aura of charisma, that even after you've been bilked of millions you have a hard time believing that this person, this business associate, this friend could have been responsible. Manipulation could be considered the negatives of the power of charisma, and when you manipulate people, sooner or later there are always consequences. In the end, it is much better to focus on the positives of charisma.

Benjamin Franklin once said:

"If rascals knew the value of virtue, they would become virtuous out of sheer rascality."

So how do you have virtue, and not fade into the background of "too nice"?... Maintain a powerful confidence, that is how. Your inner strength will shine through, and the people around you will seek comfort in your presence. You can be the mountain rising high from the jungles of mediocrity... people who are lost to low levels of self-esteem, which in the end fuels all the negatives of society - fears, perversions, jealousy, envy, anger, etc.

Charisma is enticing - you arise "hope" and "desire" in people. They see something about you, yet they have no idea what it is. What it is is an appeal to their ideals and yearnings: Delving into the subconscious, once again, most people have an inner desire to be appreciated, to be respected, to be liked by all. But most never have this desire quite fulfilled. In the end, they feel that you represent these things and that is the allure.

How long will it last? Practice enigma and they'll never know otherwise. If a person becomes familiar with you, sees you doing day to day things just like everyone else, then you will lose the aura of charisma because you've lost the element of enigma, and with it the element of allure.

Charisma is a strategy; the only way to keep it about yourself is to keep a distance from others, never letting them in your presence long enough to realize that you're just a well-dressed guy that knows how to use poise and confidence to interact with people - a predictable act. Keep the enigma about you and you retain the allure.